It hasn't been easy around here lately, and yet, I can't help but feel how very blessed we are. We've learned a lot over the past year. We've had our ups and downs with trying to add to our family, raising the girls, and coping with the realities of trying to lead successful, fulfilling lives. I'll admit that we've had some hard times. Yet the blessing are numerous.
Nick and I have a strong relationship. We've been through a lot together, but we trust each other. I've talked with several friends about how they cope with stress in their marriages, and Nick and I are fortunate enough to say that we can always talk. It may take some lengthy moments of silence between comments between one another, but we never manage to be angry with one another very long. We both have a desire to always have one another, and that makes all the difference.
We are just beginning the path of parenting our girls, and we make mistakes daily. I often feel like I don't spend enough one-on-one time with them, and there's always more that I need to be teaching them. But they love each other, they know we love them, and they appear to be happy overall. That's worth a lot.
We've had a lot of frustration with trying to get a third child. I miscarried again this week, even after being on a high dose of folic acid and even giving myself heprine injections twice a day. Those were NOT pleasant shots, and a week later, I still have some pretty good knots and bruises on my belly to prove it. But it still didn't make a difference. For some reason, our pregnancies are just not developing properly. We're not sure what is going on exactly, but we know it's worked before. Odds are that if we keep trying long enough, we'll luck out again. It's just frustrating beyond words to get pregnant, try to not stress for a couple of months, and then lose the pregnancy time after time. I have to admit though, it gives me a greater appreciation for my girls. We're not sure what we're going to do next, but neither of us feel like our family is complete. Time will tell.
We're very blessed to be surrounded with caring family, friends, and neighbors who have watched out for us. We're very, very grateful for those who continue to be there for us. Thank you.
A Total Eclipse for the Clarks
9 months ago